On Tennis Shoes and Cookbooks

In the five years that I've been playing tennis, I've been on a quest to find the perfect pair of shoes. Because I run around the court so much, I put a lot of stress on my feet. I've tried dozens of shoes, but they never quite fit right. Each new pair will do something bad to my feet: cause blisters or callouses or turf toe, always in a different location. (And lest you think these are insignificant maladies, it was a case of blisters that caused my wife to leave me.) It always takes me a while of experimenting with different sock thicknesses to get used to a new pair of shoes. I own six different kinds of athletic socks!

So I was really happy last summer when I found the perfect pair of tennis shoes. They didn't give me any of the issues the other shoes did.

The problem is, tennis shoes wear out, and as the treads on my perfect shoes wore down, I needed to replace them. I went online, only to discover that that model isn't made anymore. There was only one pair left (in my size!) so I ordered it. But when they arrived, they looked like this:

Obviously, that was not the shoes I ordered.

I got in touch with the store I ordered them from, and they tried to correct the mistake, but it turned out that my perfect shoes were mistakenly sent out of the country, and it was impossible to get them back. They refunded my money. But I really wanted the shoes.

Now I can't find that model anywhere online. They don't exist. They have been lost forever. I tried to find the next iteration of the shoe (They were called Passing Shot III, so maybe there would be a Passing Shot IV.) Nope, that only exists in the women's model. So then I went to the shoe company, Reebok, to see if they sold any tennis shoes (ie. shoes for playing tennis) at all. Nope, apparently they've stopped making those altogether.

So then I did a very stupid thing. I found a random pair of tennis shoes online and ordered them. They came this week, and last night I tried them out at the tennis workout. They looked good, but they felt like I was wearing boxes on my feet. Uncomfortable, painful, and just plain wrong. I had to leave the workout early, and when I got home I saw that the second-to-last toe on my right foot had been rubbed raw. The skin is coming off.

Sigh. So I found the perfect model of tennis shoe, but they stopped making it, the one pair that was left has been lost forever, and trying other shoes that I found online is a disaster.

Hmm. I wonder if that could be an analogy for anything else in my life?

Nope, can't think of anything.

*****

A year ago Christmas I got a new cookbook. It's an awesome cookbook. Two out of every three recipes I make from it are amazing. It is one of the main reasons that I've got so excited about cooking in the past year. The recipes are easy and don't require too much effort or too many complicated ingredients, but it does teach me new things. It's exactly my speed. It may not be the best cookbook for everyone, but it's perfect for me.

In the past year I've tried other cookbooks. But the recipes I make from them don't turn out great, or they're too advanced, or too simple, or just not very satisfying.

I think it's clear which is the cookbook for me.

Again, I wish I could apply that metaphor to something else in my life. Can anyone think of something?

Anyone? Anyone?

*****

ONLINE DATING UPDATE: This has been a rough week. I've gotten into a rhythm where I find a new profile, get really excited about it, craft and send a brilliant message, imagine all the ways it would be fun to date the person described, then slowly deflate as no response is forthcoming. Being ignored by several women at once makes the loneliness even worse.

Online dating combines the worst aspects of shopping and love. It's like going to a store with no price tags and seeing a bunch of things you like, but when you try to buy something you're told, "Sorry, you can't afford that."

Here are the current players:

#2: Divorced, 38, no kids, restaurant manager. Every time I think she's lost interest and dropped me, she resurfaces. She'll send a one-sentence message, not answer any of the questions I asked, and tell me how busy she is. Maybe so, but it's hard for me to shake the feeling that I'm not one of her first choices.

#4: Mystery Girl Sighting! Divorced single mother, 23, student at my college. Yesterday she walked past my desk for the first time in months. She was very friendly and smiley and made a comment about the weather, but didn't say anything about seeing me on Match.

She sat down in a chair across the room, facing my desk, and worked on her laptop. (Again, she hasn't done this in months.) I don't know if she expected me to come over and talk to her, but I didn't. Should I have? I still don't know if she's seen the message I sent to her on Match. According to the site, she still hasn't logged on in a month, but you also get an email when someone sends you a message, so she could have seen that. It seems like too much of a coincidence that she would come into the library just a few days after I sent her that message, but maybe it is just that. For now, Mystery Girl remains a mystery.

#5: On Monday I discovered a new candidate. 31, single, grad student. According to Match, we were a "100% match." I really liked what she wrote on her profile, it was clever and witty. Her pictures are also very cute. My only concern is that she may be a little too tall for me. I composed a message to her on Monday, but because it was that odious heart-shaped holiday I waited til Tuesday to send it. She responded, just to say she was really busy and would write more in a few days. Still waiting for that longer message.

In the meantime, I was telling a friend about this, and it turns out he knows her! He sublet her apartment over the summer. Huh. Small world. He said that she was indeed really friendly and cute. Hopefully I can meet her in person and tell her about our mutual connection.

There have been two others I've approached on OKCupid, but neither has responded. One lady approached me on OKCupid, and we've exchanged a couple of short messages, but I don't know if I should give her a number or not. She's not really my type, and her profile says something like "Sorry, guys, I'm spoken for." Then why are you online trolling for guys? Also, her profile pic shows her sticking her tongue out. I'm not a fan of "wacky" profile pics like that. Let me see what you look like, not how silly you can be.

Also, not sure where this fits into the number system, but I saw that FutureLibrarian (FL) is still on OKCupid. Remember her? She's the one I had an intense one-week online affair with, but when we met in person, she wasn't interested. But then K swept in to salve my wounded ego, and the rest was history. So, anyway, FL is still there, 15 months later, so this morning I sent her a message just to see if she'd like to hang out as friends. She's also divorced and single and around my age, and I could always use more local friends like that. She hasn't responded yet.

So that's it. More updates later.